I see this all the time.
If I am going to create a blog/vlog/podcast about helping people, the more the better, right?
Being in my late 30s, I am starting to see patterns of people around me in my age bracket. One of those patterns is how they are completely f***ing themselves.
I thought I should share it with you.
People f*** themselves with stuff.
Houses, cars, clothes, etc.
None of these things are inherently bad.
Then how do they f*** you?
If you are not careful, each “stuff” you purchase is a handcuff, a link in a chain wrapped around your wrists, then your ankles, and then your throat. Then you are f***ed.
The more you buy, the more you are committed to, the more you have to maintain, the more weight on your shoulders, the more pressure to perform, the more pressure to focus on money over happiness, the more you are f***ed.
What I Hear Too Often
“I am not happy.”
“I hate my job.”
“I am never home with my kids.”
“If I change jobs, I won’t be making as much, I can’t afford the house, the day care, the car, etc.”
You know what happens when you are unhappy? You make everyone unhappy around you. That house becomes your enemy. The bills are your enemy, then the people you are paying the bills for are your enemy. Your family, the thing you are maintaining all this “stuff” for, becomes your enemy.
Is that really where you want to be?
I hope not.
From what I see and hear, it is an awful place to be.
No one wants to be stuck.
No one wants to be trapped.
I hear the same thing every single time, “How in the f*** did I get here?”
We have the best intentions, we are thinking positively, it is what we are supposed to do: get the good job, buy the nice car, and buy the nice house.
The next thing we know, all that “stuff” is a brick in a wall that we have built up around us.
We would never want to be there.
But we do it ALL the time.
How To Avoid All Of This
Purchase as if you made less.
You may have $250,000 household income, but purchase as if you only had $150,000, or even better, $125,000.
Save the rest, but more importantly, don’t lock up the rest in “stuff.”
“Stuff” won’t make you happy.
As soon as you feel trapped, all that “stuff” makes you unhappy. After all, it is the stuff that is trapping you in the first place.
Use your credit cards to build credit, but pay it off each month. Spend what you have, not what you wish you had.
Buy the car that gets you from A to B comfortably, but there is no reason to go overboard. You work hard, you deserve a nice car, but you don’t want to have to work for the car. The car should work for you.
You don’t need to get the biggest house you can afford. Sure you qualify for a $1,000,000 loan, but why not buy a house for $600,000? Maybe it is a foreclosure, so you will make money right after you sign the paper? Or you wait to buy when there is a dip in the market and it will be easier for the property to appreciate in value?
You need to learn how to make money, but you also need to learn how to save money, and how to make money work for you.
Look at your job as if you HAD to do it. Would you marry your job? This sounds stupid, but if you had to marry it, would you? And I don’t mean 50% divorce rate marry, I mean old skool, Catholic, you are married until you die, kind of marriage.
Would you do it then?
No flexibility. No new career. No “I’ve always wanted to try this.” Nothing. Just you and that job. Till death do you part.
Will that work for you?
It wouldn’t work for me.
It doesn’t seem to be working for a large percentage of my age bracket.
It’s time to stop and think before we spend. Before we put those handcuffs on. Before we have to in order to maintain.
Give yourself a buffer, a little bit of breathing room.
So you can exhale.